When you conceive you have a multitude of books to read, to prepare you for the years ahead. When your child goes to school, you have guidance about homework and milestone from their teachers.
I remember my daughter had a Finnish friend in primary school and her Mom used to attend an annual appointment with their doctor in Finland. They would conduct a full health and milestones check and be given a booklet on what to expect for the year ahead. I thought this was the most amazing service. I honestly believe if you understand what is happening to your child, due to their age and stage, you can better deal with what comes your way.
Now enter the Parenting Teenagers Years, contact with other parents is greatly reduced, as is contact with the school. For being claimed as the most difficult stage of parenting, I feel we are the least informed.
I did a little trawling on the internet, I remember Duncan Bannatyne saying on an old programme of Dragons Den, that the UK Government produces a booklet on whatever you want to know, lo and behold they did one on Top Tips for Parents of Teenagers.
I found it to be a wonderful informative and insightful booklet, distributed by the Government Department for Health Social Services and Public Safety: https://www.dhsspsni.gov.uk/sites/default/files/publications/dhssps/top-tips-for-parents-teenager.pdf
The booklet gave me comfort that I am on the right track with most approaches and I could improve on others.
This snippet was very insightful:
When you are angry your face and tone of voice convey the most meaning to a teenager. The words you say actually count for very little.
Facial Expression 55%
Tone of Voice 38%
The above may explain why your teenager never hears what you say.
Click through and have a look at the booklet, it is reassuring to know we are on the right track.
I’ll be posting Parenting Ideas as and when I read or receive them from seasoned parents and grandparents.